I recently saw someone post a meme about how gardening gives you a glimpse into someone’s potential desire to nurture, and how it can be a good indication of how motherly a woman is or will be. And you know what I initially thought? That’s just a bunch of hoo-haw. Mostly because I don’t like gardening and I literally kill (unintentionally, which is the pathetic thing) anything in our home that doesn’t speak to me in some way. I’m not kidding. We have a plant that is currently alive only because the thing will NOT die. Overwater it, it’s good. If you forget for 2 weeks to water it, it’s fine. Believe me. That plant is amazing! And it’s a good thing it is, because I honestly can’t even remember the last time I watered it. Ugh. Just whenever I think of it.
But after I chewed on the whole gardening analogy, I realized something. There’s definitely some truth to that observation. If you can nurture a garden (which my husband has done so well for the last couple of summers), it can build perseverance, patience, and attention to detail in said gardener. All very good things if your job is to nurture little people. I started to get bummed. I thought to myself, maybe THAT’S why I get so frustrated with the kids sometimes! I should garden.
Don’t worry. You can let all those terrified potential vegetables know, I regained my senses and decided against it about one minute after the thought popped into my head. Well, first of all, I’d be a touch late. Our oldest is 18 (our crash test dummy kiddo!). Although, of course, better late than never, right? It would definitely benefit our youngest (they’re 2). But I literally have zero desire. I just don’t have any margin and I honestly just don’t want to use the margin that I happen to scrounge up to voluntarily be in dirt and pull weeds. I have to chase after twins all day, and then cart kids all over the place after school. Yeah, no. Really, I’m good. It’s just not in me.
And then I realized something else. The LORD is gracious and good, but you know what else He is? He’s really funny. Our God has a sense of humor. He can take the most unexpected person to be His disciple and allow said person to do the craziest and most unpredictable things. Say, for instance, me. I was a feminist in college. I didn’t even want to have kids when I was around 17. I thought, you know, the environment, people! We need to save the planet! Ahem. I was well educated. Worked my butt off in college, studied engineering, and had myself a really good, well-paying job when I graduated. And you’d best believe staying at home was the last thing on my mind when we first found out we were pregnant. That’s for women who don’t actually have such good career options. Definitely not me. I potentially had so much more to achieve!
So what changed? In a word, God. God changed my heart (sidenote – I’m certainly not condemning working moms! Lots do it wonderfully, to the glory of God! Hello ACB!!! Just not what the LORD had for me, specifically). I was nowhere where He wanted me to be when He first got ahold of me, but He knew. All He needed from me was a willing and contrite heart, and He’d provide the rest. No gardening skills required. Sure would have been nice, but again, God has a sense of humor. And He’s gracious. And creative.
Not all big family moms are the same. Not all moms in GENERAL are the same. Can I hear an Amen? Thank God for that. We love to pigeon hole and stereotype because it’s easier for our brains to wrap our minds around things, especially things we don’t understand. But not God. He loves to break molds and use His people in whatever capacity will glorify Him most. He uses former prostitutes, foreigners, weak, young, and old women, and everything in between. The world expects one thing. But God wants to be made known, so He can use whatever and whomever He wants to. Glory to God.
So if the LORD calls you to be a mama, don’t worry, you don’t need to be a gardener. If the LORD calls you to be single, don’t worry. You don’t need to be a career business person. The only requirement the LORD has of His children are willing hearts, and lots and lots of faith. I promise it won’t be easy, it will probably be scary, and I can pretty much guarantee it won’t be in your comfort zone. But that’s OK. When God calls, He provides and enables. And probably giggles too at His own cleverness. He is so good. I wouldn’t change my messy crazy life, my incredible husband, and my amazing 9 children, for anything in the world.
