I was just listening to Beckett Cook interviewing Costi Hinn about his latest book, “Walking in God’s Will.” That’s a big subject that brought flooding back lots of memories. God’s will can seem as if it’s one of those elusive ideas that you can never quite put your finger on. But you know what’s awesome? You don’t have to. He’ll lead and guide us, and all we need are willing, obedient hearts.
Forever ago
I remember what feels like a lifetime ago, figuring out where the LORD was leading us. We had recently had our second baby and I was itching to get home. At the time, it was an impossibility. We never planned for me to stay home. It was one of those things that “other” moms did, but not me.
Before having kids, I thought I would do what I knew and grew up with – the typical working mom scenario. Additionally, I had worked hard for my degree in Chemical Engineering and I did NOT want it to go to “waste.” So when people asked me if I was staying home when I was first pregnant, I would internally sneer as I said with a pleasant voice, “No. I’ll be working!”
That’s what YOU think
Our daughter screwed up all my plans and I couldn’t be more happy she did. It broke me when I had to leave my screaming, crazy baby girl to go to work. I knew we had to figure out a way for me to get home.
Fast forward 2 years, and we were able to get me to work part time, but it was still excruciating for me to leave my kids. I felt called to come home for them and we were doing our best to figure out the best way for our family to do that. At the same time, my husband felt called to teach overseas. I loved the idea, and so we looked for teaching positions where he could work. He was an elementary teacher at the time, and after scouring the internet, we found a great international ministry called NICS (Network of International Schools). There were jobs all around the world, but I was most excited about the possibility of going to a Spanish speaking country. I thought we could serve God internationally, and I could finally get my Spanish better (I grew up speaking Spanglish, which many Puerto Rican families do once they move to the States). PLUS I could teach our kids Spanish. What an answer to prayer!
Maybe not
But what happened was a ton of waiting with nothing from the people in Bolivia (the Spanish speaking country that needed an elementary teacher). As we anxiously waited for more information about this job in Bolivia, I kept checking the availability of other international jobs at NICS. They slowly but surely kept dwindling. My husband was confident we’d hear back soon, but we heard nothing for several weeks. By the time they got back to us to tell us they couldn’t take a family with only one working family member, there were barely any jobs left. I was angry at the school in Bolivia, annoyed at my husband, and frustrated with God.
We went back to the NICS site and found only 2 possible jobs that could work. Well, really just one (the other job in Japan could only take singles). And it was in Korea. All I could think was seriously, God?? Korea? I guess I’ll be working next year since that’ll never work.
Never say never
Never say never is a lesson I learned that day. As well as trusting in the Providence of God. Just a day after my husband submitted his resume to the school in Seoul, he was called and enthusiastically interviewed. They had been praying, and praying, and praying for a male elementary teacher. The very last day possible for them to wait before they opened it to everyone, my husband’s resume came to them.
We proceeded to spend the next 9 years in Korea. It was a place of great growth and blessing for all of us. We had 4 more babies there. I learned how to be a stay-at-home mom (although I’m still learning all the time to be honest!). We loved it.
God’s will
I share that testimony to remind us all that God’s will may seem elusive, but in reality, He is so intentional and specific. Once, a friend told me that God can only steer a moving ship. I have found that to be so true! When we step forward in faith, the LORD will direct our footsteps. It may not look the way we thought or even what we wanted, but it is ALWAYS for our best and His glory.
So my kids Spanish is atrocious and mine is meh at best. Although they love the fact they’re ancestry is half Puerto Rican and half (a mix of) Eastern European, they have a big affinity for all things Korean. They love rice and beans and empanadas, but their favorite meals are budeachigue and ramen. And that’s OK. He knows better. I can’t tell you how thankful I am for His will over mine.
God is so good. All the time. Even when we don’t understand or agree. Amen?
